Back on the horse

Oh my now I remember why I do what I do. I have had my first day back at work and whilst riddled with fear and worry and overwhelm this morning, tonight I am exhausted but exhilarated at the same time. I had forgotten how much I love my industry.

Why do we worry about things we know we do well, are capable of, love to the point where we can put it all off for another day or even physically paralyse ourselves into avoidance. I wonder how much sick leave is extended based on fear rather than need? I wonder how many find it easier to face the doctor and ask for an extension to sick leave than their job?

I had only been away for two or three weeks. Imagine how hard it would be going back to work after months of being off sick, especially if your employer doesn’t have a system for keeping in touch (appropriately) to ensure you still feel wanted and part of the team. A sense of importance that you belong I guess. Not having that must make it all so much harder getting back on the horse.

I am blessed in that I love what I do, it’s my purpose to mend and heal people and I am humbled that others will put their faith in me to enable me to work in their lives but others may not be so lucky. For someone who struggles in their role and who is already unsure if its their ‘forever’ job, it must be really very hard and more than a little soul destroying to be faced with going back to work post sick leave.

But get back you must. You have to find a way to get past that fear that grumbles away inside you and sometimes that means just doing it. For your self esteem, pride, mental and physical wellbeing and financial security, for mental stimulation, company or even as a reminder that you are really good at what you do and have been missed. It is really, really hard and I am not making light of how scary it is but sometimes you just have to be a grown up and get on. Sick leave when you are no longer sick, just afraid, is not good for you.

Your employers must play their part and for them it’s hard too with legalities, red tape, giving space but not too much but, at the end of the day, they do have a business to run and therefore it’s in their best interest to get a well employee back. How many are unsure of how to approach this chasm of the HR minefield I wonder.

I am self employed and therefore the need to get back is pretty important but that aside I am so very glad today came round and went so well. It would have been relatively easy to tell myself I needed more time off but tonight I am tired but happy and grateful I can still get out to do what I love and I will sleep with a happy heart and look forward to tomorrow.







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