Ever have those moments when you feel sorry for yourself and want what everyone else has? You have nothing. You are lonely, lost, flat and very selfish in your thoughts. Why do they have all they you don’t!
Welcome to your ego.
Your ego wants to pull you down and make you less than you are. Your ego doesn’t like it when you don’t need it. Your ego wants to put you in your place and keep you down because then it’s won.
I see ego as another being living inside. A squatter who thinks they have rights. Someone taking from all I have and giving nothing in return. They think the world owes them when they add nothing as part payment to this life. I battle with my ego in the courts inside my head and sometimes have to submit an eviction order to them.
Today is one of those days.
I have someone in my world who has just told me a secret and it’s hit a nerve and allowed my ego to jump right in and screech in my ear “Ha you haven’t got that. You will never have that, feel that, experience that. You don’t deserve it.” My ego is wearing a green suit. He’s pecking away inside my head. He’s telling me all I don’t have.
I hate my ego.
Today is a day for reflection and to get wiser than my ego. Today is a day for acceptance that sometimes I am low and tired and he sneaks through the usual barriers I have for him. Today is a day to admit I’ve allowed him to have his say and be strong, gain strength to decide when I tell him to pack his bag and get out.
That’s my choice you see. I can let him hang around and peck away making me feel lost, lonely, unworthy or I can grab him by the scruff of the neck, open the door and kick him out. That’s what choice allows. It allows you to decide, take back control and feel like you want to feel not how your ego wants. It takes strength and courage and bloody mindedness sometimes but anyone can do it if you have the will to change how you feel.
Bye ego it’s time for you to leave.