Who is he? Who is this man that we see every day in the office, in his car, starting early, working late. Who is he? Director? Salesman? Executive? Manager? Leader? Professional? No. He’s just a man.
I don’t mean that in any derogatory sense at all. I admire men. I love their commitment, I love their resilience, I love their hard working determination and commitment to whatever they do. I love their business head, their passionate sportsman head, their loving family man head, their lover, partner, friend, husband, boyfriend head and all the other roles that they do so well. I admire any man who can carry off so many roles and hold it all together.
Who is this superman? Who is this man of many talents? I believe he’s one of the people reading this blog. I believe he is your husband, colleague, boss, partner, father of your child. I believe he is the person you care about most. I believe he is the man you used to know but maybe don’t see the same man before you anymore. I believe he is not quite the man you used to know – you know he’s there somewhere but can’t quite find him. No surprise you lost him along the way. There is an expectation that he is all man to all things and all people. He puts pressure on himself to be the perfect, hard working breadwinner, father and man.
Yet this man is human….. yes human. He is made of flesh, bones and raw emotions. He can be proud, hurt, sad and struggle asking for help and yet he needs to realise that he is allowed to be that human, that vulnerable man who says “enough is enough, I cannot do this, live like this anymore”. How do I know how he feels when I’m a woman? Because I’ve been there. I’ve tried the role of all things to all people and forgotten to be me. I have been the one who puts my own needs on one side. I have been the one who hides emotions away from those I love and who love me because I don’t want them to worry or get hurt. I have been the one feeling like I need to choose between work and family. I have been the one who got it all very, very wrong and threw away all I could and should have been. I get you.
I hold the space for the Corporate Man. I walk alongside the Corporate Man. Why? Because I care and I don’t want anyone to go to the place I found myself. That deep, dark place where walking feels like you are in treacle, you’ve forgotten how to have fun, where you are tired, short tempered, frustrated, emotionally bereft and missing the person you used to be. The man who has forgotten how to live and now simply exists deserves, desires and needs more.
Is this man you? Do you know the man? Its okay to say yes. Its okay to hold out your hand and ask for someone to take it and pull you from that treacle laden floor. Its perfectly acceptable to admit you are just a man, just a human, just a person who deserves more, deserves better, deserves to be the best version of the man you see in the mirror. Why? Because that ‘just a man’ is you and you are worth it.