Have you ever been in a place where things are swimming round and round in your head and you don’t know which way to go with any of them? How satisfying and comfortable is it once you just decide! You may still not be totally agreeable with the decision, especially if the alternative is something you desperately need to do and experience, but at least you have decided instead of giving your head the constant grief of an internal battle.
As a child I know what I was like if my mum said no (dad never did). I would pout a bit, roll my eyes, stamp around for a while, huff quite a lot and once I’d got all of that out of my system I’d accept the decision and get on with things. I don’t think I’ve changed much, it’s just now its me making my own decisions and like my mum did, I ignore the postulating and wait for the calm to reappear.
Right this minute I have so much going on in my life, all of which is good and exciting, that I think I can fit in even more, that I need even more to be enjoying it. NO! Ladies and gentlemen let me tell you, when you have lots going on and think there is space for another idea listen to your gut. If your gut says “yes we can do this and still enjoy it all”, then do it. If your gut says “are you crazy this is going to tip you over the edge emotionally, physically and mentally” listen to it.
I have found over time it’s good to write it down. Send yourself, or someone you trust, a letter with your plans written down. You don’t have to follow it up, just listen to what your body tells you when you’ve done it. If you are an intuitive kind of person who can hear your own thoughts, hear your instinct and trust it, you will know what is right and what isn’t. The decision you have been traumatising yourself over is made. It doesn’t mean you won’t go back to it, it means it’s not for now. Make a note of it, write it down, play with it when you have a quiet time and make sure you plan in time to recreate it all again. Make it part of where you are going and don’t lose sight of the emotions it brought about.
Making a decision should be satisfying, creates space in your head and brings a sense of peace as long as you see it as a positive. Don’t berate yourself. If you are doing that it was probably the wrong decision and you need to go back and reassess.
Don’t tell yourself you’ve failed because you aren’t doing it now. Don’t allow yourself to worry about what others think. Don’t allow guilt or self beating take place. Park it, add it to your to do list and get back to enjoying and working on all the other things which also bring joy. All you have done is reduce your stress levels.
Your dreams and ideas are just parked up in a garage, like a rag top car under a tarpaulin until the summer comes when you can go back out, take the top down and feel the wind through your hair on a beautiful day.