No matter what we all need people. Oh how these people can influence us though and we need to take care. If your circle of friends, no matter how long you’ve known each them, are negative or bitchy or uncaring why are you surrounding yourself with them? Harsh I know! If they are like that, are you?
I once had a PE teacher at school who I really respected and she took me to one side after a class one day and very sweetly suggested I be careful who my friendship group consisted of. I, being a teenager, looked at her as if she had three heads and although smiling sweetly (because in those days you didn’t answer your teachers back) said politely “thank you miss”. Obviously as I walked away I was muttering “who is she to tell me who my friends are” as well as other things but being the sort of child I was I did think about what she said and took a look. I didn’t really get what she was saying but I was more careful moving forward, they did change and looking back she was right. If I had carried on the direction I was heading, life could have taken a very different path.
It isn’t compulsory to keep the friends you have and sometimes you have to let them go and move on. A really tough decision and action to carry out but if they aren’t serving you and making you a better person then why are you still there? Friends should lift you, help you grow, pick you up when you fall, be honest with the good and bad and they should do that for others too. They say you are the average of the five people you spend most of your time with – is this a good thing for you? If not perhaps you need to begin to expand your friendship group and let others go.
Is this callous? I don’t think so. I’ve changed my circle of friends in the last year and I am definitely a better person for it. Why? Because I have found a group who get me, are positive, willing to take risks with life, keep me safe, genuinely care for my wellbeing, encourage me and say what they see, no frills, no hiding behind words. In turn I have become a better person and am able to give me to them, support, nurture, encourage, coach, care, protect. None of the people I spent time with before were bad people but those I know brought be down to raise themselves up, gave me negativity convinced it was for my benefit, talked to my face and behind my back and were generally in the relationship for what they could get out of it, are gone. Sad but this is my life, I’m in control and I want to be the best version of myself I can be so if it’s callous I make no apologies.
Take a look at you, take a look at your friends and be honest……. We all need people but we need the right people for us. You have a choice and you have your hand on the rudder in your life. Steer it wisely.