It’s a funny old position to be in and not one I expected but here I am. Waiting. Waiting for a flight that takes me to someone I hope is waiting for me.
It’s been a whirlwind of a 24 hours. Yesterday morning I was at the gym and one phone call was all it took to turn my life upside down. One call that stopped my world spinning for a few moments while I took everything in.
And now, a day later I am waiting for a plane to take me back to a place I wasn’t intending to be today. I’ve had to discard emotions and put my big girl pants on and do things and see things and be part of things I really would rather avoid.
But this is my reality and I must move forward.
One step closer. One plane journey completed but one still to go and that’s not for 10 hours yet. Torture. I am so tired and uncomfortable after being squeezed onto a busy plane and in seats so tiny that it almost became painful.
I’m not a great flyer so to be doing this solo is even harder but I know my hand is being held virtually, so it’s bearable.
Continually getting updates to see if I am too late and all going well so far. I hate this but then I am simply the traveller and not the one holding on.
What we experience and get used to can feel strange when you are on the outside looking back. I feel alien in this world of busyness, such intense movement, rush, noise, chaos. That is not where I live. I live in silence, quiet calm, community, with laid back movement and a ‘it will happen eventually’ mentality. I like that place. I am uncomfortable in this, the one that used to be my world. How fast we change – not even three years and I feel like I’ve been placed in a different planet.
It’s late, or is that early morning and the airport is beginning to wake. First there was a team in yellow hi viz, reading sheets of paper and pointing. Next came the team in pink; some moving the spare stands that form the queue and a couple of others who weren’t quite in the mood for working but happy to take pictures of the ones who were. More people are hovering , watching the boards to see where to head to next for their flight. I still wait, I can’t sleep, I keep waiting for the message I don’t want to see; that this has all been in vain. Thankfully so far it hasn’t come.
You see all life here, waiting and what I wonder most is where have they come from, where are they going, and why! The couple behind me, one American and his partner South American (I think from her accent), I can hear are travelling but looking for work for when they get back – she is a nurse of some description and he a photographer.
But what about the lady in pink in front of me. Pink coat, sweater and hat. Where’s she going and why? Or the young couple to my right sharing some food from a plastic box, looks like cold pizza – are they going or have they been?
The booming voice of a lady behind me to my right echos around the room. She has been talking non stop for the last couple of hours and shows no sign of stopping. Not sure where she is from as I don’t know the accent or language and I don’t wish to turn and stare but I picture her. I don’t want to turn and see something else in reality as she is sensational in my head.
And then there are the numerous children – too young to be in school so going on holiday maybe? Incredibly well behaved considering the travelling they are doing to have done and the hour of the night. One is starting to flag but I think her mummy did that long ago as her patience is on the edge.
I love to people watch and create lifestyles for them in my head. I wonder what they think when they look across to the woman by the window, looking a little sad and tired, tapping on her phone. I wonder if they realise I am capturing them for all eternity…
A couple more hours and I can move again. Why didn’t I get a hotel to get my head down – far too expensive for a few hours – but how I wish there was a comfy sofa to rest on rather than this hard wooden and very uncomfortable chair.
The clock is ticking, for more than one reason.
Final leg. It’s 6:56 I’m waiting to board and I’m too late….